I have read a great many books, completed degrees and professional development in counselling and psychological and behavioural interventions and undergone my own therapy with range of practitioners.
The most wise and profound experience was from a psychic last year who not only with limited information provided to her was spot on with my life story and current circumstances but repeatedly said “you must now take Your power back”, “you must learn to say no”. She later pulled a card with person tied by their hands to a tree and said “ I hate to be negative but you have a big health battle ahead and ongoing health difficulties “. Do you have complex medical conditions she said, you need sunshine … all true and here I am in sunny Queensland
This has certainly been my story and continues. Each day I have varying levels of physical pain that I get better at managing but have my days of despair, helplessness and hopelessness but I don’t let myself drown in this. So if chronic pain and physical suffering were like a rip in the ocean, if we have knowledge and skills in managing the rip, surrendering rather than struggling, our attitude can shift and we can be brought to the shore, even if periods of struggle and fear present.
I have two less than optimal solutions for my “complex” medical conditions; a word that becomes tiresome and meaningless to hear. However I can choose to be the victim to the unfavourable options or decide to make the most workable option work best for me. Fusing with unpleasant thoughts and feelings is particularly challenging in the face of acute pain but the longer my conditions progress ( Decline) I have become accustomed to pain and it is now my norm. There are always moments in the day to take reprieve and I find I have a far more enjoyable day if I am able to diffuse from the physical pain and the negative circumstances and facts.
Moments of peace and waves of despair but Riding each wave of feelings as they arise is easier than resisting, struggling to accept or Attempts to fix . Parts of my body are broken like a tea cup with no handle, chips and small holes but I stil have other areas of functioning. I am growing tired of the challenges but I also strengthen my resilience and determination to not give up. To empower myself in whatever ways I can. Nemo and I keep swimming as I would rather move forward Than sink, fight than flee, surrender than struggle .
Simple things give me pleasure and if I continue to remind myself to take my power back daily sometimes hourly then life can be a lot easier .
There are always choices even if they seem ordinary and displeasing. An attitude shift can reshape the choice to become more favourable. My hands may well be tired but the message is Simple, never ever give up. Restore in things you can do that give you pleasure and surround yourself in environments and people who support you to thrive than diminish